Last Updated on April 26, 2023 by Laila Oliveira
To say that moving abroad is a major life event is an understatement. Everything in your life, as you know it, will change. Your address, the food you eat, the water you drink, and the language you speak. This is where a lot of people start to deal with “Expat Failure”.
But what is this term, and is there a way to overcome it? Of course! It’s normal to feel like you’ve done something wrong, but don’t worry; you’re only human. Here’s what you can do to understand it and prevent it if possible. Happy reading!
What is Expat Failure?
You might have to sacrifice a lot for this international move, leaving family and friends, relationships you’ve spent a lifetime building. You will probably have many expenses, from packing and shipping to Visa fees and destination paperwork.
I think it’s fair to say that you are undertaking an enormous investment financially, emotionally, physically, and energetically.
Being successful in this life adventure is the goal, but there are many people who find the adjustment in a new country quite difficult. I understand these obstacles to cultural adjustment all too well.
Years ago, when I first moved to Portugal, I felt completely out of place and unhappy. The move took an enormous toll on my life, and yet I didn’t have a clue as to why I was miserable or how to make positive changes.
When I began my master’s degree in intercultural psychology, I decided to research the statistics on expat failure. I wanted to understand why some people like myself found it difficult to adjust to a new country.
What happens when expats face Expat Failure?
In my studies, I came across these statistics. Up to 40% of international assignments in corporate settings failed. Expat failure is defined by employees on international assignments returning to their home country before the end of the project.
For the companies sponsoring these moves, the cost of each employee failure is estimated at approximately $300,000. The statistics and financial costs are mind-blowing, which do not even consider the emotional hardships of the employees and their families.
These findings led me to think about the expats who find themselves unhappy and unproductive but complete their overseas assignments. In my opinion, I think these percentages are much higher and probably double the failure rate. And again, the human factor, the human cost of the emotional and mental distress of the employees and families, is tremendous.
It’s important to understand why these people have been unsuccessful. According to the study, the most prevalent reason for the high failure rates came from the inability of employees and their families to adjust to the local culture and environment.
Granted, this report studied corporate settings, and many people move abroad on their own. However, these discoveries are even more relevant based on my experience working with expat clients for the past nine years.
When we move abroad, we bear the financial burden. We are responsible for all our decisions, and we alone deal with the consequences. We need to do all we can to reduce our risks and increase our chances of success.
For this reason, I’d like to share a few ideas to help you experience a successful expat journey:
Let’s Move to Europe
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Finish this sentence: We Are Moving For…
I don’t mean a list of all the reasons why you are moving. Make a statement of what you want to accomplish. What are your goals? How do you want to live your life in this new country? Create your unique definition of what success means for you and your family.
Use this as a measuring stick to help you evaluate your first year abroad and beyond. Being clear on your “We Are Moving For…” will get you through the rough patches because you’ll know which goals are important for you to accomplish and the purpose behind this life-changing decision.
Cultural training alone is not enough
Yes, learning about a new culture is important. We must learn the rules of our new countries, but knowing something doesn’t change our emotions, behaviors, or attitudes.
I had a client who knew that people in his new country were usually late for appointments. He knew that it was socially acceptable to be fifteen minutes late for a meeting. But whenever someone arrived late, he found himself annoyed, which affected how he behaved towards others; he felt that it negatively impacted his overall well-being.
To adjust your cultural lens and better adapt to the different cultural norms, you need to understand your own biases.
Doing this emotional training will help change your emotions, behaviors, and attitudes toward a new culture.
Most Importantly: Prepare!
Benjamin Franklin once said, ‘If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.’ I couldn’t agree more. But here’s the truth you just can’t prepare paperwork and logistics. Prepare yourself emotionally, physically, and mentally. Moving abroad can be stressful, exciting, overwhelming, and frustrating, all at the same time.
You don’t need to do this all on your own. There are free resources like my series of YouTube videos and the Facebook group that offers support and connection. To have a successful transition, understand there will be hard times, but know there are many resources available to help with the cultural adjustment.
My work is all about helping you and other expats and immigrants prepare for your move abroad. I am here to support you and increase your chances of success, however you define success.
You can sign up for my free online International Relocation Course here. This practical-minded course is filled with information for your move abroad.
Please feel free to contact me with questions and information about courses and 1:1 sessions. I look forward to working with you and your family.
This article is part of our series with Deborah Dahab – a certified NLP Practitioner and fellow expat that helps her clients ease into the cultural transition that comes with relocation.
Click here to register for Viv Europe’s FREE Webinar with Deborah Dahab on May 4th, 2023, at 7 pm (UCT +1 | GMT +1)!
